I Hate Myself.
Yes. That has been my go to, inner voice, feel good mantra. When someone hurt me, cut me down, or I felt inferior, which was all the time, I would say to myself…. “Thats ok, your right. But, no one can hate me as much as I hate me”. BOOM! The pain would go away. Or so I thought.
Sick right? But, think about what your inner voice says. Do you always say positive things? Or do you tell yourself how amazing you are and how hard you work? Do you tell yourself your looking good today, or do you say things like, stupid, fat, no good… you get the point. We have to change our inner voice if we are to change the way we feel about ourselves. 100 people could tell you your beautiful and smart, and 1… just 1 could say something negative and BAM!! You remember and replay the negative. So crazy… but, true. We hold tight to the nasty and forget everything else. So people enjoy the hurt of it, they crave the pain. It makes sense, it makes us feel secure. It is what we know.
We need to build up ourselves so that we never ever believe the garbage that can make it through. We need to know that we are better than that. We HAVE to change our inner voice and opinion of the inner beast. It is not easy. Please don’t think that I’m just saying it is going to happen like that! SNAP! All better. It won’t. It is so dang hard… so dang hard. But, you are worth every stinking second. When you have a moment, say, lock the keys in the car, laugh at yourself. Do not resort to the nasty. Do not call yourself silly crappy names, do not get upset with yourself. It’s a moment. One moment. Your life will be full of moments that are opportunities to either go nasty, or go positive. For the love of you and your beautiful soul, GO POSITIVE! ALWAYS POSITIVE! Change one voice, one time and you will feel joy. You will feel relief. You will start to understand that you are worth so much more than a nasty comment.
Your challenge, is to stop yourself. Stop yourself before you let loose the crap. Laugh at yourself first, then find a FUN word to use instead. I really have to work at this. Really really work at this. So do not get discouraged… anything worth having is worth working for. YOU ARE WORTH WORKING FOR! Start small my friends. Work at this everyday and I promise you will feel so much better. I tend to go back to the “I hate myself more” thing and then I take a deep breath and stop it. I have such a feeling of accomplishment when I can stop the nasty inner voice. You can do this!! On your post it, write to yourself. I WILL CHANGE MY INNER VOICE. I WILL LOVE MYSELF FULLY. I AM WORTH THE CHANGE!
Nobody should have hate for themselves. NOBODY. Your SOUL IS BEAUTIFUL. Understand that, YOUR SOUL IS BEAUTIFUL.